Mahara Wayman [00:00:05]:
Welcome to the art of badassery where I explore what it takes to live life on your own terms. Break free from the status quo and unleash your inner badass. Whether you're a rebel at heart or simply seeking inspiration to step outside your comfort zone, this podcast is for you. I'm your host, Mahara Wayman. And each week, I dive into the stories, insights, and strategies of those who've mastered the art of badassery and are living life to the fullest. They smile when no one is lucky. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome Back to the art of badassery podcast. I'm your host, Mahara Wayman.
Mahara Wayman [00:00:47]:
And today, I have, an incredible guest Who's a living testament to the pursuit of passions and the art of resilience. Let me introduce Natalie Riede, a dynamic 37 year old British spat living her extraordinary story in Germany. Natalie's journey is a tapestry woven with adventure and determination. She met her German husband while backpacking across the vast landscapes of Australia and without hesitation followed her heart to Germany. 8 years later, they continue to create their life's canvas together. Originally hailing from Nottingham, but spending most of her life in the bustling heart of London, Natalie shares a unique connection with her world. Growing up alongside her identical twin sister, they added a touch of mischief to their days, Playing tricks on unsuspecting schoolmates. Can you just picture that? From a young age, though, Natalie dreamt of becoming a renowned writer, And her passion for the written word remains as vibrant as ever today.
Mahara Wayman [00:01:50]:
In her current role as an English teacher at a private school in Germany, Natalie's love for language shines through. However, this year, her journey took an exciting turn when she established her own business. She's now clinical hypnotherapist and a transformational life coach, helping others unlock their inner potential and achieve their dreams. And as if that wasn't impressive enough, Natalie manages all of this while being a devoted mother to a lively toddler and caring for a newborn. Her sanctuary is often the local park where she finds solace amidst the chaos of life. Her favorite pastimes include walking, Yoga and getting lost in a good book. And let's not forget her artistic side. She's a connoisseur of adult coloring books, proving that she finds time for self expression even when life is a whirlwind.
Mahara Wayman [00:02:45]:
Natalie's story is really a beautiful testament to the art balancing dreams, family, and self discovery. Join us today as we explore her journey, her newfound role as a hypnotherapist and life coach, And her secrets to living a badass life. Natalie, welcome to the art of badassery podcast. I am so excited to chat with you today.
Natalie Riede [00:03:06]:
Thank you for having me on. I'm really excited to be here.
Mahara Wayman [00:03:09]:
So it was interesting, folks. I always before I hit the record button, I read The introduction back to them that I've written based on what they've sent me. And Natalie right away said, wait a second. You missed out something really important. I can't believe you didn't include that. And we realized that, I did forget to include something very important. So I'm wondering if we can go back, Natalie, to where your transformation started because it's a pretty big deal.
Natalie Riede [00:03:37]:
Yeah. So, I'm a stage 4 cancer survivor, and My cancer journey started in December 2017. I'd actually just started my role at the school. I got my dream job as an English teacher at a private school in Germany. I was so excited. So I started in the new year in September. And before then I'd been feeling a little bit down, a little bit off, but nothing really specific. I went for a check up and the doctor was like you know we'll send you for a colonoscopy scopy, because I had noticed some blood in my stool every now and then.
Natalie Riede [00:04:11]:
But she was like, it's probably polyps. You're young. You're healthy. Everything's fine. I went for a colonoscopy, and in December 2017, I got pulled into this room. My husband well, he was my fiancee at the time, and the doctor started talking in German. Now I had been learning German, But, you know, I was by no means fluent, and I heard the word crepes. And I knew that it meant cancer, but I couldn't really Process that.
Natalie Riede [00:04:40]:
I was like, what do you what do you mean? And it's only really by looking at at Conrad's face and seeing his reaction that I realized, like, oh, like, this is this is not good. And that was, like, right before Christmas, before my birthday and 4 months before our wedding. Oh. So, yeah, it was Devastating. I mean, for anybody, when when you get some really, really bad news, it's like The world just stands still, and all the sound just seems to leach out of the room, and you just feel like you're in this vacuum. And it's It's terrifying because you feel so alone. And so then we have this conversation on, you know, Do you even wanna marry me still? Which he did. He said, you know, we're gonna be exchanging vows For better, for worse, in sickness and health.
Natalie Riede [00:05:37]:
Unfortunately, the the bad health came before the bowels. So, yeah, that's that's kind of when everything started, and I wouldn't say that I changed so much. I put my life on hold. I really just kept thinking, you know, I I don't know how to process What's happening? So I shut it down. I pushed all my emotions down as you do as a typical Brit, you know, stiff upper lip. We're not taught to process our emotions. Nobody wants to see you cry. People have it worse than you do.
Natalie Riede [00:06:11]:
So that's what I did. I pushed all of those emotions down And I pretended that I was fine when I clearly really wasn't. And I had surgery and chemotherapy, and interestingly enough because I didn't lose my hair, I felt like an imposter because I didn't look like the typical cancer patient. I definitely had a lot of Experiences with other people, you know, asking me if I was even really sick. So you could imagine, like, there was a lot. A lot. And, 6 months after I'd finished chemo and everything, I had surgery to, remove the temporary ileostomy that I had, due to complications from surgery and a 1 in 1 in 1,000,000 reaction to a painkiller I was taking that completely destroyed my immune system. I had a septic abscess and no white blood cells.
Natalie Riede [00:07:15]:
Like, I had nothing to phytoast the infection. So I had emergency surgery and woke up quarantined in a room alone, An adopter came in, you know, with a mask, a gown, the booties, the gloves, everything, and I had no idea what was Going on, I've had surgery, and the next thing I'm waking up and you're like, I'm sorry. There's not really anything we can do. You're either going to pull through or you're not, and that was a really, Really traumatic time. I mean, worse than the cancer just being told out of the blue, You're probably going to die, and we can make you comfortable. Like, I had just got married. I'd just Gotten through cancer and through chemo, and and there I was being told I might die from A 1 in 1 in a 1 in a 1 in a 1 in a 1 in a 1 reaction to a painkiller. Like, what is that?
Mahara Wayman [00:08:19]:
K. So I'm just gonna I wanted to send you a big hug and, oh my god comment. But what really is coming to my mind is, was there any at any point when you went, okay. This is a joke. I'm looking like Yeah. When when when's when's
Natalie Riede [00:08:41]:
punch line.
Mahara Wayman [00:08:41]:
And then say, you know, here's the punch line. Because all I can think is this is unreal. Yeah. How do you navigate such a unreal circumstance? To your point, we have all heard the word cancer. We all know people And maybe you've experienced some level of it very close to our family. So it's become quite a common thing. Oh my god. Did you know so and so has been diagnosed with a cancer? Mhmm.
Mahara Wayman [00:09:06]:
No. That this idea of, oh my god. Did you know that so she got the 1 in a 1000000 lottery ticket. It's so unheard of. So what what was going through your mind?
Natalie Riede [00:09:19]:
I honestly at the moment when I was told, like, that was that all happened. I just can't believe it. I mean, I had I felt like I had Come through the cancer which actually in hindsight I really hadn't because I had pushed my emotions down, but I had deferred everything thinking, Once I finish chemo, I'm gonna feel better. Like, once I finish this, I'll get better. And then all of a sudden, something completely out of the blue took me out. And, I mean, I was hallucinating as well because I had a raging temperature, and I really had this whole life. So unfair. This is so unfair.
Natalie Riede [00:10:01]:
And then there was this little voice who was like, Maybe this is it. Like, maybe you're not meant meant to still be him. You know? Like, somebody's trying to take you out. And it was just such an odd moment because I hallucinated so much of the time, and then I had these lucid moments and, Yeah. Like, my mom was the sole carer of my granddad who was dying from cancer at the time. My twin sister was living in China, so she flew over in case I needed bone marrow or or anything. I don't know. It wasn't really The craziest time to go from thinking I've beat cancer to this is it.
Natalie Riede [00:10:43]:
I'm gonna die. I mean, I had literally just got married in April, and there it is in June. I'm on my deathbed, and it just felt like a really sick joke.
Mahara Wayman [00:10:54]:
Yeah. Of course it did. How long were you on your deathbed? Was this just a couple of months?
Natalie Riede [00:10:59]:
Hovered between life and death for over a month, And so you can imagine I lost a ton of weight, I had bad sores, so, I mean, I was cut from, like, here to here, and then they had to leave it open and come out and, like, clean it and everything. I had a catheter. Like, I I couldn't walk. I couldn't get out of bed. I couldn't do anything, because, I mean, the doctor's like, we can make you Comfortable we can give you painkillers which of course just made just made it worse with like their hallucinations. I really lost touch with a lot of Like, reality, just sitting in a room. This is, like, when my love of the the coloring books came because that's Where I found peace. It's really I could just zone out.
Natalie Riede [00:11:48]:
And, obviously, I realize now it's like an act of meditation and of mindfulness Just to zone out and choose the color and just to watch the pencils go through the the lines and everything, particularly like mandalas and Like, you just get so absorbed, and I took a turn for the worse, and I I planned my funeral, And we had postponed our really big wedding ceremony and just had a small ceremony, and so I asked my mum If I could be buried in this big, beautiful wedding dress that I was never gonna get to wear. And the interesting thing with what happened is by facing this fear head on I'm talking through the eulogy and the song that I want to be played and And all of that, that evening I had this epiphany. It was The most beautiful profound moment of of my life. Well I don't know if it was God, the universe, My higher self, me, whatever it was, I just felt this this spot of life within me that was like, hey, it is not your time to go, this is not it. If you want to, you can. You can just go peacefully. But if you wanna stay here, you have got To fight for it, you have got to live your life. And so the next day when I woke up, the doctor came into my room and And I had, like, loads of people coming in the room because, you know, I wasn't an anomaly, you know.
Natalie Riede [00:13:42]:
I had this 1 in a 1000000 reaction. I had An identical twin sister who's perfectly healthy, and there's me, like, you know, lying there. So it was a very interesting case. And the doctor walked in the room, and I remember saying to him, right. I've decided. I'm going to live, and I'm going to America. And I think it was, like, 8 weeks or something for, a trip with my then husband. And the doctor was like, I don't think you understand, like, the severity of what's going on.
Natalie Riede [00:14:18]:
I was like, no. No. No. I've decided. I'm going to live. And I don't know whether it was my energy or serendipity, but he came up with this really radical therapy where he wanted to find a match for me, to use somebody else's white blood cells To stimulate the growth of my own and it turns out my newlywed husband was a perfect match for me and it worked. It was Amazing and it was not an overnight miracle, but, you know, it started this this process where they could weed me off the painkillers. And, I mean the doctor thought there was something wrong with me, he sent a therapist to see me because he was like she's lost it, she's, you know, she's gone.
Natalie Riede [00:15:06]:
But actually having this this epiphany and this mindset, this complete shift was radical for me and, You know, I had to learn how to walk again. I had to have physical therapy. I had a wheelchair, and then I graduated from, like, walking to the door to Walking down the corridor to walking to the garden, and that's kind of where my love of walking came from as well because for me that represents utter freedom, And I suddenly appreciated my entire body and my life and the beauty of nature and everything. I saw things so Clearly, it's like this fog had lifted, and I realized how beautiful and precious life really is. And so not that I recommend getting cancer or almost dying for anybody and it's kind of a sad State of affairs that a lot of us had to have something traumatic happen to have this moment, but I am forever grateful Because from that moment on, I became a completely different version of myself, and And I just love my entire life, and my entire being with every fiber of my being. I just love Everything about my life. I just love it.
Mahara Wayman [00:16:27]:
Oh my goodness. What a story. So can I just Say and I'm sure lots of people have said this to you, but I wanna say it too? I'm so glad that you stepped up And you made that choice because the world obviously needed you then and continues to need you now. Because I truly believe We are all here for a reason. I wanna ask though, when you look back, can you see were there any other times in your life where you were getting the signal to slow down, and you ignored it. Because what Yeah. You just described was, okay, it's almost as if the universe was like, Jesus. We've been telling her to slow down for, you know, 25 years, and she's gonna okay.
Mahara Wayman [00:17:11]:
She's gonna listen to this one. Right? You won't have a choice but to listen this time. So you You did you can see that now in retrospect?
Natalie Riede [00:17:18]:
Yeah. Oh, for sure. Definitely. I mean, I would say that I was a massive workaholic, Massive workaholic. I derived a lot of self worth from achieving things, doing things, but also being everything to everybody. But I was like a work hard, play hard kind of a girl as well. I mean, you know, I would go out, like, drinking Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday. You know? I'm like I was on all the time.
Natalie Riede [00:17:47]:
And it was just too much and, like, I would throw myself into things, like, at the deep end, Not realising that I was drowning and it's the same like I got this job and I had worked and I had hustled to get that job And you know I had digestive issues like even when I was at university you know I had endoscopies and everything and they never found anything and Like I can say now at 37 with all the experiences that I've had, like, there were definitely signals that I needed to slow down But also that I needed to process my emotions because, I mean, a lot of it I mean, maybe it is a British thing, We really taught, like, you know, stop crying. You know, it's bad to feel these negative emotions. Nobody wants to see that. You know, stiff up a lip, you're okay, keep going, brush yourself off. And so when you're used to that, you don't know how to process What you're going through, you've got no emotional resilience. So then when something like cancer comes, like, you don't you don't know what to do with it. You don't have any strategies or coping methods or anything, you just you bury it down, you know, like you're just pushing it down, and you get so used to Holding this space, you're not realizing you're blocking your energy. Like, and I do fully believe that we hold a lot of toxic energy By holding on to all of this trauma and memories and and every bad thing that's ever happened to you, We hold that in our bodies and, you know, and and I got cancer a second time, like, after that.
Natalie Riede [00:19:27]:
Like, I had that epiphany and I started to do some inner work, And then the cancer came back, and they're like, boom. Hello. Stay tall.
Mahara Wayman [00:19:36]:
Before you tell us about the 2nd onslaught slot of cancer, I wanna Go a little bit further into this idea that the British have been raised, and we I have lots of British friends. I've lived in England. And you're right. There's this general consensus, you know, Stiff upper lip. Don't feel any Yes. But, really, it is an it's an epidemic that's worldwide, especially the western cultures. Maybe not so much in in, you know, other cultures, but I do agree that It was it's one of the biggest misunderstandings and and, unfortunate incidences or unfortunate, What's the word I'm looking for? It's a lie that if you don't think about your emotions, it goes away. Because to the point, you and I are both coaches.
Mahara Wayman [00:20:25]:
We both know now through our own experiences and those of our clients that the only way to get Over, and I put that in quotation marks, a challenging feeling is to give it some space.
Natalie Riede [00:20:39]:
Mhmm. Right?
Mahara Wayman [00:20:40]:
And I actually just recorded a reel today for TikTok talking about recognizing that, first of all, feelings aren't facts. So you feel like a shit, doesn't mean you are a shit. You can feel like a loser, doesn't mean you are a loser. But, also, you know, It's the only way to fit to really look at and and then navigate your feelings is to give them the space to experience them because feelings come up for a reason. The hair Mhmm. You You know, it's the body's way of saying, hey. I wanna I'm tapping you on the shoulder. You need to pay attention to this or that, but it doesn't mean that we have to live there.
Mahara Wayman [00:21:14]:
So I think many of us grew up thinking, if I don't if I don't think about the feeling, if I don't feel it, then I'm okay, and it'll go away. Well, people, it never goes away. All that happens, to your point, is we just get sicker and sicker, and the body finds a way to make us deal with it. So the English are not alone. I'm joking. And I grew up thinking that's not a good feeling, you know, because we we'd have these labels of good and bad. That's bad. I shouldn't feel it.
Mahara Wayman [00:21:42]:
Versus, That's interesting. Why am I feeling that?
Natalie Riede [00:21:45]:
It's a huge difference.
Mahara Wayman [00:21:46]:
Yeah. Exactly. So my mind is blown and so is that of our audience because you got cancer again?
Natalie Riede [00:21:55]:
I did.
Mahara Wayman [00:21:57]:
Okay. Tell us about that.
Natalie Riede [00:22:01]:
Yeah. So after all of that, I Actually got help. I went to a rehabilitation center, and that's when I kind of dove into holistic health. I did, you know, Mindfulness and meditation and art therapy and dance therapy and yoga and walking and like anything that you could possibly think of, like, I did it. And I slowly started this this process of of changing my my mindset, my perspective, and I felt like I was coming out of the other side. And we had postponed our honeymoon, and we were going to the Maldives, And the doctors are like, you're great, you're healthy, you're no evidence of disease. We're gonna move your scans from every 3 months to every 6 months. And I'm like, yes.
Natalie Riede [00:22:50]:
This is perfect. We have postponed our big wedding ceremony. We're gonna celebrate me being 1 year cancer free and have this massive party With our friends coming from all over the world and I went for my 6 month scan and they found a tumour in my liver. And I didn't realize this, but when cancer metastasizes, it automatically bumps you to stage 4. Now what you've heard and what everybody else has heard and what I heard is, like, stage 4 equals terminal. Like Like, that is it. There is no stage 5. Like, that's this is it.
Natalie Riede [00:23:30]:
So when the doctor said, I'm really sorry. There's a tumour in your liver. It's traveled from your colon. It's stage 4, and I'm like, so what does that mean? He's like, well, We'll do surgery and we'll do treatments, and if it doesn't work, we're talking palliative care. And I'm like, no. No. I don't accept this. I was really I was just not available for that.
Natalie Riede [00:23:57]:
I really wasn't because I had started to do this mindset work. So I was like, okay. Well, then what's the steps? What do I need to do? And so I had surgery and they cut me from like here to here and then across again and so like I'm covered in scarves and I was in hospital and the nurses are like, you are the most positive stage four cancer patient we've ever met. And I'm like, yeah, cool. Like, Let's get going. Let's get me walking. Let's get me out because I realized, and this is, like, the the my biggest takeaway from everything, I could not control if the cancer came back or not. I could not control if some random thing is gonna take me out, But I could control how I reacted to it, and that shift Made my cancer journey as a stage 4 cancer patient completely different.
Natalie Riede [00:24:52]:
You know, I would rock up to my chemotherapy, Put my headphones on, listen to a meditation, munching my little snacks, you know, I I like I I had my go bag ready to go, you know, with my drinks and my teas and, like, my feel good things. I knew what to expect, but I could preempt those bad days, and I Started to communicate how I was really feeling because with the 1st cancer, I had put on this mask of Toxic positivity. I had pulled it out. I didn't wanna be a burden to anybody, and so I pushed down that anxiety and that fear. And as we know, like, that's exhausting, pretending all the time, but also in that place, That fear and anxiety can fester and you play this what if game, like what if this happens, what if this happens, and this negative Thought cycle just continues and it drags you down. Well, I knew that I needed to break that cycle And so stage 4 was just like another Tuesday for me. Like, I know that sounds blase, but, I was just like, this is not gonna take me out. I'm not this is just it.
Natalie Riede [00:26:06]:
I'm not accepting that reality. And so, yeah, I had surgery and I had more chemo and I can now happily say I'm celebrating 4 years, no evidence of disease. And in 2 weeks time I'm going for my next scan and then next year I will officially be classed as being in remission. And I truly believe that our mindset is so pivotal for health because there is a mind body connection.
Mahara Wayman [00:26:35]:
Tion. So we're gonna take a short break right now, but I'll be back with my guest within 60 seconds. Ladies, unlock your inner badass And transform your life with my monthly subscription workshop. For just $47 a month, you'll have exclusive access To work closely with me, Mahara Wayman, as we dive deep into all things badass from personal development to conquering your goals. Imagine waking up every day with confidence, purpose, and a smile that radiates your newfound strength. Take advantage of this badass opportunity and join us today at www.mindfulnesswithmahara .com and start your journey toward a happier, more confident you. Smile when no one is looking. You've earned it.
Natalie Riede [00:27:25]:
I could have sat in my victimhood. I could have sat in there and been like, this is not fair. This is not okay that I'm going through this A second time, I could have wallowed in my grief and railed at the world by the unfairness of it all. But because I'd had that near death experience, I was like, well, tomorrow's not guaranteed for anybody. Just because you have cancer doesn't mean you're gonna die first. You could get hit by a bus. And it sounds morbid but actually looking at at your life as a gift changes everything because most of us, we go through everything and just, like, it's just life.
Mahara Wayman [00:28:05]:
I you know what? It's not morbid, and I think it's really I think it's powerful that you're able to speak about it this way. And to your point, I mean, it sounds cliche, and I know And I don't mean and I know you don't mean to negate anybody's fear when they are going through either a a terminal diagnosis or just a really traumatic experience. But when we can fully embrace and understand that we are, Number 1, spiritual beings having a human existence, but we always have a choice. We can choose to, I don't wanna say give in, but we can choose to accept the limitations that are put on us by the outside world, by the authorities, by the medical profession, for example, or question. And it sounds like you Obviously, we're forced to question again, but you had that realization that there are things I can't control, But there are things I can control. Yeah. And what I'm hearing, and this is very brave and very badass, is is choosing to be in control through the discomfort and the disappointment and the disillusionment. Like, holy fuck.
Mahara Wayman [00:29:27]:
I got it again? Like, what? You want me to learn this lesson again? Okay. But what I did hear was that this time around, you actually were much more honest about your feelings And what you could do and couldn't do versus the 1st time around where you were like, no. This toxic positivity, I'm I'm glad you brought it up because I think it is It's it's, well, it's toxic. Right? It's really not the thing. And I I struggle even myself. Sometimes, you know, I grew up with the fake it till you make it.
Natalie Riede [00:29:57]:
Oh, yeah.
Mahara Wayman [00:29:57]:
I don't like saying that anymore because, like, no. No. How about I just admit that I'm hurting or uncomfortable or any one of the beautiful words that I now know as an adult rather than just say rather than just the fake smile. So, Hats off to you, and thank you for sharing your story because I I know that there are listeners that can resonate not only with the fear, but with The power of recognizing that when we take control of our actions, magic happens. We may not like the path. Right? No one wants to be given a terminal diagnosis. No one wants to break their legs. No one wants to have a heartache or lose their job, Any of that stuff.
Mahara Wayman [00:30:41]:
But when we can recognize the fear and take action anyway
Natalie Riede [00:30:48]:
Exactly.
Mahara Wayman [00:30:49]:
Really Makes the journey easier, and in fact, I think opens up the path for some for some beautiful miracles. So Thank you for sharing that story. So I just wanna make sure I've got this right.
Natalie Riede [00:31:01]:
Yeah.
Mahara Wayman [00:31:02]:
You are now cancer free. I love it. Yes. You've done a tremendous amount of work. And while you love being a teacher, you have also decided and made the very courageous decision To start your own business. And I know it's courageous because I'm doing it too. So and now you've got 2 children. But before we
Natalie Riede [00:31:23]:
do do.
Mahara Wayman [00:31:24]:
Kids, What was it about your journey, or can you remember when you said, okay. I wanna do something like this for a living?
Natalie Riede [00:31:32]:
Yes. I know exactly when. I I went back to work and I did a parent teacher meeting and I was meeting the parents for the first Time and the class teacher started by telling an anecdote about how he had bumped into a pupil that he had taught, I think it was over 10 years ago and I had this visceral no, mm-mm, mm-mm, I don't wanna do this for another 10 years, I don't wanna still. And it's funny because I had worked so hard for that. I had gone through the chemo and the rehabilitation and everything and gone back for work and I even did an additional teaching qualification and I did it all on while I was pregnant and then on maternity and this is all during COVID, like it was, you know, it was a huge thing because I was just waiting to go back to work and and Step into this life that I put on hold, and then I got back and this visceral, uh-uh, Uh-uh. This is this is not it, and it was so weird because I didn't know what I wanted to do. I just knew it was not that, and I can't even tell you what it was about it. It was just this This this moment, like, physically, I recoiled.
Natalie Riede [00:32:54]:
I was just like, nope. And I remember coming home and talking to my husband, and I was like, I don't wanna be a teacher anymore. And he was like, what do you mean? Like, this is your dream. This is and I'm like, no. It's not this is not it anymore. So I had to yeah. I spent, like, almost a year trying different things. I was journaling it out.
Natalie Riede [00:33:14]:
I was Diving into writing, I was doing courses on on children's writing and books, and I had still been doing therapies and meditation and hypnotherapy. And I talked to one of my girlfriends who was a kindergarten teacher, and she was miserable. So I was like, babe, you've got a long life. Like, who are you waiting for? Like, who who'd you wait want to give you permission to go after your dreams? What do you wanna do? And she's like, oh, you're gonna laugh at me. I'm like, I will never laugh at you. You're like, you're the safe space here. I'm gonna be your biggest cheerleader. She wanted to be a potter, So I was like, then learn to do pottery.
Natalie Riede [00:33:53]:
And she's like, well, it's not easy. I'm like, it is. It is that easy. We put all these things in in front of us, these these hurdles, these obstacles, but actually, if you Have a dream and a vision and a goal and a why and a purpose, and it outweighs those fears, those anxieties, those doubts. You've gotta just have the courage to do it. Just take 1 step and then another step. And so she became a potter, like, she has our own studio and everything, and I was like, maybe I should take my own advice. What is it that I really wanna do? Really dig into it? And I think sometimes we are afraid to be uncomfortable with our own Thoughts.
Natalie Riede [00:34:38]:
We make decisions based on what we think others want us to do or what we think the logical step would be, And I really had to pull that all aside, and I was like, why don't I take my experience as a cancer survivor and as a teacher and all of my experiences and retrain so that I can help people make rapid emotional and mental healing. Because by using hypnotherapy and neurolinguistic program, like, you can dive straight to the subconscious, the root of where all of our Visions and actions and habits live in our trauma and, like, make rapid changes. Why not do that? And at the time I was pregnant, and I was like, yeah. I'm gonna do it. So for my entire pregnancy, I was studying. And even the day after I gave birth, I was online doing one of my courses because I I have this passion and this spark, and I'm living a life that is so Abundant and joyful and I feel like this is what I was meant to be doing. Not that I wish I had cancer, but I'm taking that experience and I am helping others navigate their own journeys with authenticity and positivity and Been like, hey. It's hard, and it's okay that it's hard.
Natalie Riede [00:36:05]:
But if, like, you wanna help to get out of it, Let me help you. Let me walk beside you. And, yeah, stepping into this this new role is Just magical. It really is.
Mahara Wayman [00:36:20]:
Those of you that aren't watching the video, go to YouTube and watch the video because her energy first 1st of all, it was always beautiful, but when she just now, it was through the roof, and it's really lovely to see. And, Natalie, I can appreciate what you're saying because, you know, I have a very similar experience. Bottom line is when we are brave enough To sit with the discomfort of being a human being, magic can happen. And if you need help with that, Then there are people around you to help. You are not alone in your journey. Natalie wasn't alone. I'm not alone, and you're not alone. So just a little plug for for coaching and therapy and what there's lots of modalities that work.
Mahara Wayman [00:37:01]:
But what I think is really special about your story, Natalie, is that you Face the fear anyway because you came to a point where you're like, I can't bought I can't pretend. You know, you can't pretend when you're in a hospital and you're all cut up and open, and they're like, and your and your funeral. There's no pretending anymore. And I think it's incredibly courageous of you to have stepped up to your greatness. One of the things I talk about a lot with my clients and just in general is We are not here by accident, and every single person on this earth has a story and has a purpose. Do not be afraid to explore what your purpose is. If and it's okay to change your mind. Right? Because, you know, it just blows my mind that we expect Kids 16 and 17, what do you wanna be when you grow up? And then we're, you know, let's go to school for 6 years and spend $100,000 on an education.
Mahara Wayman [00:37:56]:
And so many of them change their minds or like, you know, I don't even wanna do this. But Mhmm. All these reasons that we know, we get trapped into Pretending to be something that we're not. So part of my work is helping clients to understand you know, being badass is just being yourself. And if yourself to stay home and eat chocolate and listen to Dave Matthews all the time, you know, go for it. You may not wanna live like that forever, but it's okay to acknowledge What it is that you really want out of life. So I wanna move forward a little bit. You've got 2 children.
Natalie Riede [00:38:30]:
I do.
Mahara Wayman [00:38:31]:
Congratulations. It's the best job ever being a mom. My children are all grown, 2025. I'm curious though. As you sit in this place of joy and gratitude and happiness and just excitement and and, and a lightness for your life. And you look at your 2 children. What what's the number one thing that you want To teach them.
Natalie Riede [00:39:00]:
Oh, that is a good question. For me, it is. I wanna teach them emotional resilience. I really wanna teach them that it is okay to feel your feelings. And, You know, I am a coach and I am trained, but, god, I catch myself sometimes repeating that same generational, like, thing that you get taught. Right? You know? Like, my My son would cry and I'm like, you're fine. Get up. You're okay.
Natalie Riede [00:39:27]:
And I'm like, actually, it's okay. You know, he's in the terrible twos and he's having tantrums, And I sit with him. I'm like, it's okay if you're angry. It is okay for being frustrated. It's not okay if you just throw things at your sister, But it's okay. And I acknowledge his feelings, and I give him a space to feel those emotions because, I mean, This poor little guy, he's like in this chaos, right, and I have to be the calm in the storm. God, it is difficult sometimes, like, Being a mom is probably the hardest job out there for sure, but I want my children to grow up in a world where they know that, like, there are no good feelings and there are no bad feelings. Feelings are just feelings.
Natalie Riede [00:40:14]:
And the, like, the thing that we know the most is, like, our feelings, and our thoughts create our feelings, and our feelings create our behaviors. Right? So, like, I need to model the best behavior that I can for my children to give them a leg up because it's guaranteed they're gonna face Struggles and challenges and setbacks and obstacles because that is the human experience. Right? Nobody nobody gets out of life unscathed. There's gonna be something. And I don't want them to have to experience something as traumatic as almost dying or cancer to be able to, like, process their emotions, and I feel like connecting with that will allow them to be true to themselves. They're not gonna allow any outside forces to convince them that They need to be this, or they need to do this, or feel this beginning because they're gonna know who they are. I felt lost for a really long period of time, And now I'm like, this is who I am, and I know that I'm too much for some people. I know that.
Natalie Riede [00:41:21]:
I know that, you know, I'm a little bit too woo for some people. You know, they think I'm, like, barefoot barefoot crystal hugging, tree hugging Person or or whatever. I know that it's too much for people but I do feel like I have manifested my dream life and It doesn't matter to me what other people think anymore because I love myself and I want my kids to love themselves. They don't need me to tell them how amazing they are. They need to know it. And how can they know it if I'm not like, oh my god. Isn't that amazing? I don't role. Your question.
Mahara Wayman [00:41:57]:
Yes. Yes. And but it really brought up something else. So first of all, I love that answer for what you want for your children, and I applaud you for that. What it made me think of, though, was, you know, as a parent and as a member of society, not only do we want to instill emotional intelligence with our children And with ourselves. Well, I think one of the things that I've seen missing is we have become, for the most part, incredibly lazy with language. And when I got turned on to Susan David and her work on emotional intelligence, I really resonated with this with this conversation that was, Yes. But what are you really feeling? Because and I would say I remember saying it to my kids, and they would get so mad at me.
Mahara Wayman [00:42:39]:
Like, they'd be pissed. They'd be angry. And they're like, I'm so upset, mom. I'm like, really? Why are you upset? I'm just upset. No. No. No. You gotta listen.
Mahara Wayman [00:42:47]:
There are probably 25 words in the English language that you can use. You're 15. Let's choose a better work, and they're like, okay. Who are you, and why are you speaking to me like this? But I wanted them to get really clear on what it was. Are you embarrassed? Are you tired? Are you are you you know, all of these long list of things Mhmm. That all fall under the umbrella of upset, but let's get to let's get very Clear on what you're feeling. And it's part of this emotional intelligence conundrum that if we don't have the words, how can we express it? And as a mute, I remember thinking when my children were very little, like, oh my god. If you could just talk, if you could just tell me what's wrong with you, then I could fix it.
Mahara Wayman [00:43:30]:
And therein lies the problem because if we don't learn the language, if we're not given permission to explore that feeling and then given the tools to, to identify the feeling as being a, b, c, d, e, or f Mhmm. How do how do we possibly become comfortable with ourselves? So I love that that's what you want to share with your little ones. And, you know, if we all those of you that are listening, whether you have kids or not, if you just take a moment And picture what your world would look like if everyone had the level of emotional intelligence that Natalie and I are talking about, yourself included. What would that world look like? I think it would be flipping awesome. Bad things would still happen, but it may not have the effect and the and the domino effect in our society that we've seen so much. And And I'm just talking even in our families. Right? If we could learn to date and have and give ourselves permission. That's another thing that that I wanted to mention to you was Hats off to you for giving yourself permission to go through this and to grow from it rather than to not.
Natalie Riede [00:44:40]:
Definitely. And I think we all need to experience and practice, like, self compassion as well because, I mean, You know, just because I am a coach doesn't mean that I don't have bad days or I have bad because even yesterday, I had I had a little bit of a breakdown, but actually, I needed that breakdown to be able to break through. I think I I've been pushing so hard with being a mom and doing my business and doing all these things that I hadn't just allowed myself to be like, You know? And and that's what happened yesterday. I just I was on a call with some of my girlfriends, and I just started to cry. And I can't tell you, like, what set it off, but I needed that release. And I think sometimes we have to remind ourselves that We also need to prioritize our own self care and self compassion, and I had this, you know, again, this inner voice which Always comes from your childhood, doesn't it? It's that if you're not doing something, you're lazy, and actually just being is so powerful and that's one of the reasons why I like the coloring book because it it gave me that peace, but now I'm learning to, like, be a little bit more strategic with my mindfulness. I'm like, I actually need to do anything To just be for a moment, whatever that looks like, and I think that that is also something that we can learn throughout our day, and this is why I try and teach my children. And I I tell anybody, Really? Like, when was the last time you took a few deep breaths? Like, seriously, when did you last just breathe and be?
Mahara Wayman [00:46:30]:
So beautiful. Oh my goodness. So much so much wisdom in your story, and I'm so thankful that we connected and that, I wanna thank you again for sharing your story with us. What are 3 things that you would like to share or leave with our listeners? Three little tips that you've learned to help you either be mindful, to be present, to be calm, to be happy.
Natalie Riede [00:46:51]:
Okay. So my top tip is if you are really feeling down, I mean, it doesn't matter, like, how bad that feeling is, Move your body because if you change your physiology, it changes your mood. So whether that is going out for a walk in nature or whacking on some tunes and dancing around Whatever it is, but you'll find if you move your body and and change your energy, it changes your mood instantly. Because we cannot feel 2 things at once, like we're either happy or we're fat at that particular time whatever that is, and so allowing yourself just to move your body changes your mood. The second thing is breathing. One of my favorite breathing techniques, we call it the chill seeker breathing. You literally just inhale through your nose, Hold your breath for the mental count of 3 and then exhale through the mouth for the mental count of 5, and when you do that Your whole body relaxes, you're getting oxygen in your body which hey you need that to live right? It's amazing how women we're tense, we breathe so shallowly And by actually breathing and just connecting in that moment and allowing yourself to relax, you can end up being more productive and more creative, And it improves your sleep as well and just gives you this little I call them pockets of peace. It's just this moment where I can just relax.
Natalie Riede [00:48:12]:
So that is my 2nd tip. And my third thing, I love love love love love love affirmations and affirmations. So I start my morning by saying, you know, I'm happy, healthy, and wealthy. I'm radiant, and I glow. I think I am glowing. But I also use ask confirmations where I'm like why am I so happy? Why am I so healthy? And that changes it slightly because then my brain is like oh, How do we how do we make that happen? So I use them both interchangeably, by starting my day. Like, literally, I open my eyes. Before I do anything, I say my affirmations and affirmations, and it just kind of sets up my day.
Natalie Riede [00:49:01]:
So, yeah, I think that that's really My top 3 things.
Mahara Wayman [00:49:04]:
I love them. I'm just gonna repeat them real quick for you guys. Number 1, move. Number 2, breathe. Number 3, affirm and ask. Oh, yeah. I love it. Natalie, thank you so much for this conversation.
Mahara Wayman [00:49:20]:
Guys, check the show notes. I want you to be able to connect with her and see all of the amazing work that she's doing. My name is Mahara. Thank you for joining us on today's episode, and I'll see you next week on the art of badassery. I think we can all agree, Natalie is badass. Have a great week, everyone. Thank you for tuning in to the art of badassery. I hope you enjoyed today's episode and gained valuable insights to help unleash your inner badass.
Mahara Wayman [00:49:51]:
If you found this podcast helpful, please leave a rating or review on on your favorite platform. Your feedback not only helps me improve the show, but it also helps others like yourself discover the podcast. Until next time, keep embracing your authenticity and living life on your terms. Here's to you.
