Mahara Wayman [00:00:05]:
Welcome to the art of badassery where I explore what it takes to live life on your own terms. Break free from the status quo and unleash your inner badass. Whether you're a rebel at heart or simply seeking inspiration to step outside your comfort zone, this podcast is for you. I'm your host, Mahara Wayman and each week I dive into the stories, insights and strategies of those who have mastered the art of badassery and are living life to the fullest. They smile when no one is looking. Welcome to the art of badassery podcast. I'm your host, Mahara Wayman. And today, I'm really excited to introduce you to Megan Gall, a dynamic lady with a rich journey from Staten Island, New York.
Mahara Wayman [00:00:52]:
Megan has navigated her way from aspiring music teacher to history enthusiast and social studies educator, finding confidence and fulfillment through various roles in teaching, management, and strategy. Her personal health journey where she lost a £100 and maintained that since 2019, inspired her to coach others in authentic self compassionate weight loss. When she's not coaching, Megan loves traveling, exploring history, supporting friends in the arts, and enjoying game nights with her partner. Welcome to the show, Megan. I'm so excited to dive into your story of badassery.
Megan Gaul [00:01:29]:
Thanks so much, Mahara. That was a great comprehensive intro. Thank you.
Mahara Wayman [00:01:34]:
My absolute pleasure. I often open my show by asking guests to share why they wanted to be on the show and what they feel is their biggest their biggest act of badassery. So let's let's go there. Why are you a badass, girl?
Megan Gaul [00:01:48]:
Whoo. So, I mean, the easy answer is, something that some you know, fewer people than we wish had actually accomplished this. So it would be losing a £100 and maintaining that weight loss since 2019. That's kind of the quick answer that comes up. But I think the other piece of that is the more important piece, which is through doing that, I totally changed how I approached my health and self compassion. And that's the harder journey. It's the harder part of that whole process. So in a quick in a quick answer, it would be that that area.
Mahara Wayman [00:02:29]:
Well, you know what? I really appreciate your first of all, highlighting that there are surface things and there are deeper things in the world. And without a doubt, losing navigating your health in a way like losing a £100 and being able to keep it off is is magnificent, and it's totally badass. I struggled with my weight, so I know what it what it's like to to look at that and look at our habits. But to your point, there's so much more to it than that. So would you mind taking us back to when you were younger and you first realized that and correct me. Was it weight that highlighted a need for change, or was it your relationship to food? Which came first?
Megan Gaul [00:03:17]:
You hit the nail on the head because it feels like a chicken or the egg situation. But for me, I think I addressed weight in a superficial way earlier than I addressed my issues with food, but I think the the place where more deeper lasting change came from was when I purposefully addressed my relationship with food without needing weight to be a part of it. It seems kind of paradoxical, but I saw a change in my weight that was more lasting when I put my relationship with food higher than my weight. And that really that piece of it really didn't become the top priority until probably 2017, 2018. And that was when I was I was in a job that was, you know, working for me, but didn't feel I know I wasn't really comfortable in it. I was stressed to the max every day, and I was seeing an emotional eating habit just raging out of control, and I did not recognize it for emotional eating. It came on so slowly that it just felt like how I lived my life. But I felt this this shame in how I was overeating in the middle of the day, at the end of the day, and this shame in how I didn't feel like I could change that.
Megan Gaul [00:04:47]:
I felt really helpless, really unable to make a dent in that habit, but I knew it was that cycle of guilt was causing me such such turmoil inside that I couldn't really tell anyone that that was what prompted me to reach out to someone for help with with my relationship with food.
Mahara Wayman [00:05:11]:
Okay. First of all, I'm very proud of you.
Megan Gaul [00:05:14]:
Thank you. It's not easy.
Mahara Wayman [00:05:18]:
No. It's not easy. And when we first okay. It takes a hell of a lot of courage to ask for help. What a badass thing to do. Being a badass isn't about knowing it all, being the best, all of that stuff. I really believe, and we talk about it a lot on the show, that you just have to be yourself. Mhmm.
Mahara Wayman [00:05:38]:
If yourself is hurting, then ask for help. So, you know, I just really wanna call that out that it is badass to ask for help. We are not on this journey alone. We are we're in a community. And with the technology that now stands look. You're in one part of the world. I'm in another part of the world, and we're having this great connection. But, yeah, asking for help is totally badass.
Mahara Wayman [00:06:02]:
But let's go back a little bit further, if you wouldn't mind, to when when do you think you developed the habit? Like, when was the first time that you found comfort in food, I guess, is what I'm really asking, if you can eat back that far because we do find comfort in food. We find comfort in a lot of things. For some of us, it's food. For some of us, it's pop. For some of us, it's pornography. For some of us, it's alcohol. I mean, you name it. Right? But when did you first recognize that food gave you comfort?
Megan Gaul [00:06:31]:
I think I love that you said we we go to many things because I think it's okay for food to be a comfort, but it can't be the only comfort. And I think for me, at a certain point, I realized it was the only, the easiest, the first, the lowest hanging fruit comfort. I didn't see that until like 2017, 2016, around there. But the roots, like you said, they did start earlier. So for example, as, you know, an 8, 9 year old, I remember, I remember specifically having to feeling like I didn't really have to, but feeling like I had to hide food from parents. Right? And it wasn't because of I I would get any trouble. It was just me avoiding a simple comment of, oh, we're gonna have dinner in 2 hours. Put that away.
Megan Gaul [00:07:23]:
Like, it was just me avoiding that difficulty of hearing that comment from a parent that caused me to, to treat food between meals as kind of a a thing to hide, a thing to for forbid myself from or feel a little guilty about. So that's kind of where I first saw food in a kind of a negative relationship. And I think the flip side of that when I started using it for comfort was when the reins are off a little bit, late high school, early college, many of us experience kind of a a freedom to rebel, a freedom to do the things that we most wanted to do, but felt stifled in some way. And for me, that was like, oh, I get to go to a buffet every day at college. I can I can eat as much as I like? I can eat anything that I like. And I think I developed a bit of a pride around being able to finish stuff and keep up with the boys and that kind of thing. So, that kind of morphed into slowly over time, I started seeing probably in late college, and this is like after I had, after I had had an initial weight loss, attempt which involved some restriction. So I think the piece after that was in late college seeing myself do a bit of binging behavior.
Megan Gaul [00:08:54]:
So this is, like, middle of the night scrounging for coins to go to the vending machine because we didn't really have, you know, food in the dorm. So it was that feeling of discomfort and scarcity that I was solving with getting food that I I really didn't need, but that really hit my, you know, pleasure centers, the Cheetos, the Kit Kats, all that stuff. And so that was the big that was the time where I really saw using food to feel better. And to go a little further even to link it to way past college, I saw a pattern of rebelling again against that bout of weight loss in college and kind of resolving never to never to diet that way again. And I saw myself just kind of paying no attention to my food other than whatever felt good in the moment, whatever meal sounded great at the restaurant, whatever snacks sounded best at the bodega, that just became became something I did not think about. I just indulged indulged indulged with no with no forethought or, desire to be healthier. And slowly, I realized I was doing that twice a day, just eating a ton of food twice a day, and I saw it linked to my work as this is the time I don't have to think about work. This is the time I get to relax from work, push everything else out, Don't have to think about stress.
Megan Gaul [00:10:35]:
I just get to sit in front of some food and just numb out for an hour or 2. So that's how I see that trajectory kind of rolling from childhood through college, through early adulthood. And I'm sure a lot of folks can relate.
Mahara Wayman [00:10:49]:
Oh, I can totally relate. And, you know, one of the thing thank you for that, by the way. You explained it really, really well. One of the things that I I also wanna add to this conversation is we live in a society that often uses food to tempt and to congratulate and to and to show favor. You've done a good job. Would you like a lollipop? Oh, what a great meal. You know, let's go let's celebrate and go out for dinner. Let's celebrate with a nice cake.
Mahara Wayman [00:11:17]:
All of those things, and it's so it it seems so innocuous, and it is Mhmm. Until it isn't. Because you and I both know that and I suspect many of our listeners know as well that when we're little, we just don't have the brainpower to put 2 and 2 together often. You make false assumptions. Like what you shared about the one time mommy said put that away. Dinner's you know, don't ruin your appetite for dinner. There was a we may have felt shame. So the second time it happened, we feel shame.
Mahara Wayman [00:11:48]:
The third time it happened, it just we just don't tell anybody about it, so we start hiding the food because we don't feel the shame. Years later, as adults, we can recognize that, you know, that's just a misunderstanding. We didn't mommy didn't mean to make us feel shame. She just wanted us to, you know, not eat not eat crap before dinner. Right? Simple as that. However, often, we've we form misunderstandings when we're young, and I really I really resonate with the idea of self compassionate weight loss because we need compassion because it is not about food. It's not as simple as that. Guys, it is not as simple as that.
Mahara Wayman [00:12:21]:
If you that all your your daughter, wife, son, friend, all they need to do is eat less. That's the least of it. Mhmm. So tell me about the beginning of self compassionate weight loss.
Megan Gaul [00:12:35]:
So I think the first key is understanding that it's not being forced upon you. I think that that you you can only pursue it in a self compassionate way if you are fully aligned to making that choice yourself and understanding that it is a choice and not something you're being forced into. I think so many of us have, they we feel like almost like you're miles underwater. This pressure over us of the ocean, the weight of the water of and the that water is, like, just this idea of how we're supposed to look. And this, I think, is so common for women, and I know it's happening more for men too. But I think the weight of women, it's it's got so many years behind it, so much entrenched. Family expectations, media that we're reading, and then but we're watching these images that we're constantly surrounded by, even children's movies. Like, there is no way to grow up without, you know, unless you're in a remote place somewhere.
Megan Gaul [00:13:51]:
Growing up without this idea that thin is right, thin is how you appear competent and smart and sophisticated and beautiful and accepted. So I think all that is to say we feel forced by that. We feel forced because we want to be accepted. We wanna be a part of our community and be loved and be accepted, and we've equate all that weight is helping us equate that with being thin, losing weight. If we if our body doesn't fit that idea of what a competent, beautiful, smart person looks like, there's such a feeling of force to this journey of weight loss. So I think the coming to it in a comp self compassionate way, we have to first acknowledge I don't need to do this. There is nothing wrong with me right now. There's no one who will come to my house and arrest me if I do not lose this weight.
Megan Gaul [00:14:55]:
And I I think that that applies to so much of life. Like, you don't you don't come to a goal and or a project that someone else is telling you do to do with the same verve, creativity, kindness, and excitement as something that you fully chose to do for yourself. So that's the first piece, which means that you get to choose if it's not the right time for you. If you're like, for example, for people like me who have emotional eating pasts, if there's a time where there's a relapse or there's like a, bubbling up of mental health, you know, difficulty that is making it hard to pursue weight loss or weight management in a kind way or in a calm way, it can be paused. It can be put on the back burner. It doesn't have to be right now. It's not urgent. So I think that's the most important piece.
Mahara Wayman [00:15:56]:
Okay. Super powerful and really quite touching how you describe that. I wanna just jump I wanna add something and and get your opinion on it because I think I know I've succumbed to to this falsehood, which is also and all of the things that you described about being thin, one thing that you didn't say, and I that's why I'm bringing it up, is this idea that only thin people are healthy.
Megan Gaul [00:16:22]:
Mhmm.
Mahara Wayman [00:16:23]:
If you're not a certain size, then you must be unhealthy. And that drives me to distraction.
Megan Gaul [00:16:29]:
Me too.
Mahara Wayman [00:16:30]:
Because it it's they're just not they don't need to be equated in hell so tightly together. Of course, you can be unhealthy at any size or any weight or any shape, but we have bought into the bullshit that only thin people are healthy for the most part. Right? I think it's beginning to shift now as we're having more conversations about it, which is why I'm so happy we're having this conversation today. Where where do you think this need to be in control may fit into our journeys of emotional eating?
Megan Gaul [00:17:03]:
That is a very, very good question. I think it's just so intertwined, this need to be in control. I think it can lead to for us to set all kinds of goals or, do all kinds of things in the name of health that may not be sustainable long term. So, for example, I think, I think folks who take on a restrictive way of eating for a temporary kind of weight loss stint, let's say, are often the folks who see themselves in that yo yo cycle over and over again because they're they're getting roped into this Like, let's say you're giving up all sugar. Right? Like, that's a pretty common one. Like, I'm swearing off sugar. It's gonna be temporary. And I think that can come from a need to, like, well, I wanna control this.
Megan Gaul [00:18:05]:
I hate the discomfort of that decision in the moment. Should I have the sugar? Should I not? So I'm gonna make that decision right now. No sugar. Don't have to think about it. I'm in control. And I think what that does is if someone is doing that to reach a healthier weight, it may work because you're having fewer calories. You know, you might be eating more healthful foods that are more filling. It may work, temporarily.
Megan Gaul [00:18:30]:
And then if if that's something that you purposefully said is a temporary solution and you can't see yourself doing it when Christmas rolls around or, in 2 years or 5 years, then you're gonna find that that weight loss that you achieved through that restriction is going to slowly come back over time as you're not adhering to that restriction. So I think there's a lot of need for control and that causes people to do really drastic things in the short term, and I really think that when you hear diets don't work, I think that's what doesn't work about diets. It's the temporary nature that, that is purposefully formulated to, like, be just for 75 days or just for 30 days. Yeah. I I think that's kinda what came up when you asked that question.
Mahara Wayman [00:19:26]:
Good stuff. Thank you. Thank you for sharing for explaining and and talking about that. When I first struggled with my weight was after I had kids. Well, that's not really when I first, but that's when I sort of took action on it. And I remember thinking at the time, I just wanna be skinny again. And, really, it wasn't until very recently, so 30 years later, that I recognized that what I really wanted was just to feel good about myself. Mhmm.
Mahara Wayman [00:19:54]:
And I'm wondering when on your journey that the question changed and became one that was a little bit more deeper. Because to your point, when we keep things surface and I just wanna be I wanna diet to lose £20, it's not really addressing the feeling that you want. And sometimes if we're not addressing the feeling, whether we're, you know, this size or that size, if we haven't addressed the feeling that we're missing out on, we're still unhappy.
Megan Gaul [00:20:24]:
Yes. It is amazing how how much we put together that physical feeling of being thin, however we're contrasting it. Like, maybe we are currently overweight, and we're contrasting that feeling of, you know, I I feel my my body moving in different ways. I feel tight in my clothes. Whatever that feeling is. I feel pain when I get up. We're contrasting it to that feeling that maybe we had in our early adulthood or maybe, you know, we had a few years ago of feeling energetic, feeling, you know, on top of the world, feeling like the whole closet you can wear the whole closet. You know? Like, I can just throw something on and feel great.
Megan Gaul [00:21:05]:
So we simplify in our brains. You know, okay. Skinny means I feel great, and fat means I feel terrible. And we we our brains love that black and white, and therefore, the urgency of the feeling of we wanna feel good, we wanna feel confident, the whole closet's, you know, open to us, we associate that only with thin. But it's interesting when you try to complicate that black and white because there are so many people who fit someone's definition of fat and who are the most confident people you'll ever see. They're they're, like, mentally healthy. They've got a great circle of friends. They have a closet full of clothes that they feel awesome in.
Megan Gaul [00:21:53]:
And so the existence of those people and also the existence of folks who are thin and who have all these feelings that we're mentioning that we're associating with that low energy, you know, no confidence. The existence of this really complicates that idea of skinny must be where I should go to feel great. And I think that also helps when you're thinking about doing a weight loss journey. You can really ask yourself, like you said, it what is it that I'm searching for here? Am I searching for a a picture on my summer vacation that I can look back at and say, wow. I was so thin and beautiful and everyone loved me, and I don't say that lightly because that's a strong feeling. Right? Like, that is a strong desire. Or am I looking at this and saying, I feel exhausted in my day to day. I wanna feel energetic.
Megan Gaul [00:22:52]:
I wanna feel like I can play with my kids. You get to decide whether weight loss is the way to to a pursue that or maybe there's other healthy lifestyle changes you want to make that are more direct to that. So maybe if your goal is is energy, maybe the goal is morning walks, like more steps in the day, strength strength training, more water, like may or better sleep. Like, maybe those are the ways that you should go. So I think it it allows you to kind of step back and take weight loss out of this all encompassing context. Like, weight loss makes everything better unless you look a little more logically at it and say, is weight loss the thing that I need right now to reach where I'm trying to go? If so, let's go at it steadily with, you know, directness and without needing to attach a timetable to it. And if not, what are the other things that I can pursue that are in my control that will get me where I wanna go?
Mahara Wayman [00:24:02]:
Oh, so so so good. One of the things that I come up against still in my late fifties is wrestling with the idea of my worth. Yeah.
Megan Gaul [00:24:15]:
That's interesting. Shoulders just like just dropped.
Mahara Wayman [00:24:18]:
It's so interesting because I I worked for over 12 years for Weight Watchers.
Megan Gaul [00:24:24]:
Mhmm. Yes. We were talking about this.
Mahara Wayman [00:24:27]:
And, you know, I've had some when I think back on my journey with them, some really interesting moments. And one of the most telling experiences I had, and it was didn't feel good, and I regret it. I really do. But it was such a learning opportunity was there was a time when as leaders of a of a workshop, we were encouraged to share our story and talk about the fact that we were also Weight Watcher members. And I absolutely see the the reasoning behind that. We're all 1. We're all in this together. And leaders at that time, we had to be at our goal weight.
Mahara Wayman [00:25:02]:
We couldn't be overweight leaders.
Megan Gaul [00:25:04]:
That blows my mind.
Mahara Wayman [00:25:05]:
I don't even wanna go there. I can't go, but I'll get a moment. But I remember leading a a workshop or a class or a meeting. I can't even remember what they taught called them back then. And I was in a nice dress. I was standing up in front of a group of, I don't know, maybe 50 people, 50 of my members. And I shared with them that I was really struggling because I gained £5. And at the time, I didn't think anything of it because I'm just being open.
Mahara Wayman [00:25:30]:
Right? Just being myself. Well, as soon as I said it, I saw some people's faces just fall, And they weren't it wasn't sadness or surprise. It was shame. And I realized in that moment that they had inadvertently felt shame because they looked at me as somebody that was great weight. I look great. I'm well, look at that great dress. Doesn't she look wonderful? And I was sharing that I didn't feel wonderful. And they felt shame Yes.
Mahara Wayman [00:26:03]:
In that moment. And I was devastated when I realized that, and it threw me off. And I realized that something was desperately wrong in how I navigated my work and how the weight loss industry as a whole looked at weight. And, truly, that was the beginning of my discontent, shall we say, with what I did for a living because I thought it's so much more complicated than how we're treating it. It's just so much more complicated. And I felt I felt I wasn't given the tools to really stand up there and share. And now, you know, 10 years later, I'm a life coach. I'm a high performance coach, and I I get it so much more.
Mahara Wayman [00:26:45]:
But I I'm so sad for my for the for the woman that used to be. And, truly, I'm sad for the people that were in my meeting that day because I did them a disservice. And I still find myself doing a disservice even though I know better. I know better, and I still say, do, and think things that belittle me as a woman today.
Megan Gaul [00:27:07]:
And do you feel that they their their, eyes falling, was that like, my my projection onto that, like, I'm imagining the feeling of I feel not right with myself, and this person who looks like she's in exactly the place I wanna be is also struggling with the same thing. Does that mean I will get there and it won't be fixed? Is that kind of the feeling that you felt they had?
Mahara Wayman [00:27:31]:
That's exactly the feeling I felt they had was like, wow. How does she not see? Like, what's wrong with her Mhmm. That she can't see that I would kill to be that way?
Megan Gaul [00:27:44]:
Yeah. And it's amazing how it can be that way for us looking ahead and backward in our own lives. Like Exactly. Oh, it's amazing. Like, you can think of myself in college at, you know, just under 200 feeling like I feel the worst I've ever felt. Like, if I can only be like I was 3 years ago. And then me just a few years later being at 2 30, 2 35 and feeling if only I could be how I was at the end of college, it would be I would just feel wonderful. Like, that's a false equation.
Megan Gaul [00:28:21]:
It's it's a false it's a false equation that we're we're putting between your scale weight, how you look, and how it actually feels to be there. And I think it just illuminates how much more important the your point of view of yourself is than like, there are so many more things that go into that than your weight.
Mahara Wayman [00:28:48]:
So, so true. And I will I'll share with you while I was, you know, around that same time, I was in the car with with my youngest child, and I was struggling with my weight, I guess. And I made some kind of a derogatory comment, kind of talking to myself actually because she was she would have been 11 or 12 at the time. How old is she now? Yeah. She would have been a young teenager. And I was muttering to myself, beating beating myself up for something, and my beautiful daughter put her arm on my leg as because she was in the passenger seat as I was driving down the highway. And she said, mama, you do know that I love you no matter your size. And I started to cry.
Megan Gaul [00:29:31]:
Oh my goodness. How wonderful.
Mahara Wayman [00:29:35]:
It was wonderful, and it was heartbreaking because I thought first of all, am I talking out loud? Like, I I don't even think I realized. Mhmm. Then I I felt all of these emotions. I felt shame that I would share that with my youngest. I felt pride that I have raised a child that was so intuitive and and loving and gracious that she would share that with me. And I I felt lucky, actually, that she was that she chose to be my daughter in this life because I think as souls, we choose who we need to be with. But now all of these years later, I feel other things because, you know, my children, they suffered from my challenge. And we've all grown up in a in a world where we play so much.
Mahara Wayman [00:30:24]:
And the children more so than even you and I because of the age of technology and social media, you know, they have in their hand what they think is ideal. And I see it now. I I look back on all the years, and I just think, oh, I wish I had done things differently. But taking a deep breath, recognizing that we all have our choices, and it's never too late to make a choice for ourselves. But what I would like to say is to the people that are listening, and and perhaps I'd love you to jump in, how do we how do we get how do we understand that we are so much more than the scale? Like, what is the first step to self acceptance? How do we how do we start that conversation with ourselves or with our daughters or with our mothers?
Megan Gaul [00:31:15]:
The first step towards self acceptance. I think I think for me, it was a real tuning in to what my brain was actually saying about me. Because, I think this phrase of negative self talk, I think it's it confused me for a long time, and I thought I didn't have it because my brain wasn't thinking in in simple sentences that I could just pick out. My brain was just a cloud of, like, buzzing. I don't know if you can relate to that. But, but it really took and this is why I'm so grateful that I went for help and the the form that of help that I went for was cognitive behavioral therapy, CBT. The the help that it provided me was this calmness to sit with that buzzing until it it made itself a little more clear because there were actually words in there, assumptions in there, beliefs in there. But I I couldn't really get in touch with it or understand it because I I think it was just so uncomfortable for me that I was tensing myself against it.
Megan Gaul [00:32:29]:
And I'm sure that's very common. I think the growth of these somatic practices where we're getting much more in touch with our nervous system and our aim is emotional regulation, I think that is such a wonderful thing because, truly, we can't under so many of us are stuck in this, tense wall putting up kind of state where we don't we're not even aware of the ways that we're working against self acceptance. So I think my first step is is in whatever way you can, foster that sense of calm and stillness that lets you cut through that buzz and hear a little more detail in what's happening in the brain. So for me, I love, like, a free write, like a brain dump. You don't even have to think cerebrally about it or make sentences. Just write. Just write. Just write.
Megan Gaul [00:33:26]:
Light a candle and just write. I also love I came to love this over time, guided meditations at first, because it was very hard for me to just sit with that buzz. A guided meditation was very helpful because it was a little bit of structure, but it allowed me that that stillness and calm to see what was going on. I would specifically remember some some practices where you would visualize, put a color on, put a shape on the feeling that was happening or the thought that was happening. So all of those things are just different ways of awareness of your thoughts, and that's the only place you can really get to what the story is behind how you're not accepting yourself.
Mahara Wayman [00:34:15]:
Love that you brought up the word story because what really support supported me in my journey and how I support clients in turn is we do a deep dive on the story. And like you said, I didn't even realize half of what I was saying. Not only not what I was saying out loud, but what the underlying story was. I remember one day, my dear friend, and we're still friends today. We've been friends for about 38 years. One day yeah. We she's such a she's such a dear friend. I'm so blessed.
Mahara Wayman [00:34:49]:
But I remember I was just being facetious as always, being flippant about my weight and my eating habits, and she got really mad at me. And she said, I'm done. And I'm like, what? What are you talking about? And she goes, do you hear yourself? Why are you saying that to yourself? I'm sick of it. Do you realize that you've said x, y, and z? And, honestly, my mouth fell open. I didn't realize. I was so used to the narrative, and I thought it was I thought if I made fun of myself first, then it wouldn't hurt if I gave permission to others to do the same, and it wouldn't hurt because I'd started it. And how sad is that? But she called me out on it, and I remember, and this is before Weight Watchers. We were just young women.
Mahara Wayman [00:35:33]:
But I remember thinking, oh my god. I how did that happen? I I was just so confused. And now when I when I work with clients, you know, I'll say, so what's the story? And they're like, what do you mean? I'm like, okay. Just imagine yourself in that situation. X happens. What's the very first thing you hear in your in your head? What's the story that voice is saying? And then we do a deep dive on the story, and we find out if it's true or not. But the narrative that that shapes our lives, that's where the juice is. Problem is that most of us don't wanna listen to it, so we just ignore it.
Mahara Wayman [00:36:10]:
But what I've learned is I can't ignore it because that's that's my soul talking to me. That's that's my inner help inner self asking for help. So when slow down and listen to what we're saying about ourselves or about someone else, then we learn, okay. Wow. Whenever I see that commercial on TV, I give myself shit. I said, what is it about that commercial that affects me so? Oh my god. It reminds me of the time that this happened. Whatever.
Mahara Wayman [00:36:40]:
Like, there's always a story. Yeah. But to your point, understanding our narrative can really open up and illuminate where we need to love ourselves more And we need to forgive ourselves more.
Megan Gaul [00:36:55]:
And it's only the first, like, the first step of that.
Mahara Wayman [00:36:59]:
It's the layer. And, really, how I how I approach it, and this may resonate with you and it may resonate with our listeners is I give myself permission to be curious. Mhmm. I say, it's okay for me to be curious. It kind of lightens the energy. So it's not an energy of of fear or anger or distrust or mistrust. It's an energy of curiosity, like when I was a kid. You know? Remember when you were a kid? And it was like Oh, max.
Mahara Wayman [00:37:28]:
How come? How come? Why can't I? Why can't I? How come? What makes? When we when we can look at our lives through the lens of childish curiosity, it can feel easier to look at the answer.
Megan Gaul [00:37:40]:
And you know what I love about that that you said, the the curiosity, is that there's no attachment in curiosity. Like, it's there is no need for you to to have the immediate answer. There's no need for, someone who's curious. Like, they don't care what the answer is. They just wanna know more. But what we get locked into when we're looking at something without curiosity, but with fear or judgment or, shame or guilt, Those are all, indicative of we we are scared that the answer is gonna be this certain thing, and that's gonna mean something very terrible about ourselves, and we can't face it. So the the fact that you lean into curiosity, and it's it's really powerful because it prompts you to say, I don't care what the answer is. All of it is okay.
Megan Gaul [00:38:32]:
I would just like to know a little more. Oh, that's wonderful.
Mahara Wayman [00:38:37]:
People, if you wanna be badass, get curious. Get curious about why you are feeling the way that you are without judgment. And I do think I know, again, from experience, man, judgment hurts.
Megan Gaul [00:38:50]:
Yeah.
Mahara Wayman [00:38:50]:
And when you find when I find myself judging others, I now know to go, k. Wait a second. I'm really judging myself.
Megan Gaul [00:38:58]:
Yes.
Mahara Wayman [00:38:59]:
What do I need to what do I need to do a deep dive on? And then, of course, I go into meditation, and I I very much enjoy somatic practices as well. Would you mind telling us a little bit more about where you're at today with your health journey? You've managed to keep off, you know, the added weight that you you obviously no longer need. And are you working full time as a coach?
Megan Gaul [00:39:23]:
Yes. I'm working full time as a health coach. So my program is is 1 on 1. So we work closely together. You know, I'm I'm there alongside you. We're looking at your, situation together with curiosity, and we're brainstorming and solution finding, to move you forward to your goal. So, I work with folks who have that weight loss goal, But, specifically, with folks who aren't trying to, you know, hit a timeline, meet it by a certain date, do it for the wedding, do it for the the vacation. I wanna I wanna work with folks who aim to make this a burn the boats kind of change.
Megan Gaul [00:40:04]:
Like, you know, now that I'm looking more at my health and devoting more of my week and day to my healthy habits, I don't ever wanna take that time away from my healthy habits. I don't wanna hit a point in my life where I'm saying, okay. I'm done looking at my health. Bloop. So that's the folks that I like to, most work with. And speaking of curiosity, we work a lot with food journaling, to understand what's happening now. It's it's all about that self acceptance of what the reality reality is right now. Even if it feels at first like I'm ashamed of what's happening now.
Megan Gaul [00:40:48]:
I wasn't always eating this way. I used to take better care of myself. I there's a lot of shame and story that goes behind what the reality looks like right now and our willingness or unwillingness to look at that. So if someone hires me at a coach as a coach, we work towards I I create kind of a structure for us to do that in a way where you're supported. So I'm doing that full time, and I've been doing that for about 2 years.
Mahara Wayman [00:41:17]:
What's the most badass thing that you've learned about yourself in those 2 years?
Megan Gaul [00:41:21]:
Oh, okay. So I I always thought that I needed, I needed some kind of external structure in order to make a living. I always thought I needed someone to tell me what to do and a boss to tell me what's required. And the really cool thing I've discovered over the past 2 years, and even before that as I was contemplating this change, was that, no. I can be self directed. I can have a goal and, pursue it in a reasonable way and get help when I need to and, live that way. So the cool thing I've learned since then is I can support myself without having a boss tell me what to do. Got it.
Megan Gaul [00:42:14]:
Hope that. It seems silly, but it is, I think I think a lot of us I don't know how how widespread this is, but I'm sure there are other people who have only pursued certain careers because of a sense of safety or I think I know what's going on here. I I can't miss this up too bad. So to change my directions and to go in a really self directed way has been a big shift for me, and I'm proud of myself for doing it.
Mahara Wayman [00:42:42]:
And so you should be. I'm an entrepreneur as well, and it is not easy, folks. I've talked about it a few times on the show. It's actually really quite challenging. Yeah. But it's worth the journey. So, really, so many juicy things that you shared with us today, Megan. The the biggest thing that I wanna call out though is what I heard you say is that you recognize your worth.
Mahara Wayman [00:43:07]:
I want all of our listeners, regardless of where you're at on your weight loss journey or your health journey or your personal growth journey, take a moment to just sit back and take and and recognize how worthy you are just by existing. You're not worthy because of the job you have or the clothes you wear or the size you are. You're worthy because you're here, and the world needs you. Whatever you bring, we need it. So that's kind of what I'm taking away from from our conversation today, Megan. And the fact that you have navigated a weight loss journey and been successful and are now giving back to the community, what you've learned, I wanna thank you for that because I know firsthand how desperately we need that.
Megan Gaul [00:43:53]:
Oh, thank you so much. And and you're you're you're succeeding with what you wanna do with this podcast. Like, you are just sharing the voices of how every single person can be a badass. Like, it's just amazing. I I love the idea behind what you're sharing. So thank you for doing that.
Mahara Wayman [00:44:14]:
Oh, my absolute pleasure. This has been the art of badassery. My name is Mahara. Join us next week for another great conversation with some badass in the planet. If you're interested in working with Megan or with me for that matter, check out the show notes because all of the ways that you can connect with us are there. If you have any thoughts or feedback on our conversation today, again, please reach out. Let us know what you thought. Rate the episode and share it with your friends.
Mahara Wayman [00:44:40]:
Take care, everyone. We'll see you next week. Bye. Thanks for tuning in to another badass episode. Your support means the world to me. So if you enjoyed what you heard today, don't forget to like, share, and rate the episode on your favorite podcast platform. Your feedback keeps the badassery flowing. And, hey, if you're ready to unleash your inner badass and conquer whatever life throws your way, why not book a complimentary badass breakthrough session? Just click the link in the show notes to schedule your session, and let's kick some serious butt together.
Mahara Wayman [00:45:13]:
Until next time, stay fearless, stay fabulous, and, of course, stay badass. This is Mahara signing off.
